For the past 3 months we have been reading books about habit building as well as hosted our first in person meetup in NYC. Therefore, we would like to take time to reflect on our latest read as well as the event and give you the key takeaways from this part of our reading journey so you can confidently continue creating healthy habits.
After reading ‘The One Thing’ by Gary Keller, the book feels like a GPS for your goals. It’s all about dialing in on the most important matters so you can achieve your dreams. Keller says, “Don’t be a scattered squirrel chasing every nut; be a focused cheetah sprinting for that one juicy gazelle.” He suggests that we find that one domino that when you knock it over, sets off a chain reaction of success in your life.
We will break down the book into 4 parts and give you the most important takeaways as well as action points to implement in your life.
1. Introduction
The Domino Effect: Toppling dominoes is pretty straightforward. You line them up and tip over the first one. In the real world, though, it’s a bit more complicated. The challenge is that life doesn’t line everything up for us and say, “Here’s where you should start.” Highly successful people know this. So every day they line up their priorities anew, find the lead domino, and whack away at it until it falls. Why does this approach work? Because extraordinary success is sequential, not simultaneous
2. The Lies
Keller explains that there are 6 lies that are between you and your ability to be successful. These are:
- Everything Matters Equally:
- Multitasking
- A Disciplined Life
- Willpower Is Always on Will-Call
- A Balanced Life
- Big Is Bad
Out of all of these, we would like to highlight the ones that we believe would resonate with many. To begin with, the author argues that we have to have a clear formula on how to decide what we should tackle first. Lacking a clear formula for making decisions, we get reactive and fall back on familiar, comfortable ways to decide what to do. As a result, we haphazardly select approaches that undermine our success. The best decision gets traded for any decision, and what should be progress simply becomes a trap
Moreover, he points out that our tendency to create to-do-lists is actually counter effective. Instead, he urges everyone to start making success lists as compared to a to-do list.
Another lie from the list is related to balanced life. In the words of Gary Keller ‘The idea of balance is exactly that—an idea. In philosophy “the golden mean” is the moderate middle between polar extremes, a concept used to describe a place between two positions that is more desirable than one state or the other. This is a grand idea, but not a very practical one. Idealistic, but not realistic. Balance doesn’t exist.’ He continues to explain that in essence, what we need to do is counter-balance. For example, when looking at the concept of work-life balance, there will be times you have to prioritize your work and that will take time away from your personal life, and vice versa. But, he warns that no one should ever go too long neglecting the prioritization of your personal life. Because, once that suffers, it will have an effect on the rest of the pillars of your life. Moreover, life does not wait for anyone so there are some events in our existence that cannot be relived twice and therefore we have to make sure we do not miss out on those.
We invite you to share your favourite parts from this chapter in the comment section!
3. The Truth: Simple Path to Productivity
We often over complicate our lives and work, working long hours without much purpose. Success doesn’t come from doing everything but from doing a few things exceptionally well and we usually succeed in spite of most of what we do, not because of it. The key to success lies in asking the right questions, as the quality of our answers is determined by the quality of our questions. The ultimate question to ask is, “What’s the one thing I can do that will make everything else easier or unnecessary?” Extraordinary results stem from our choices and actions, not luck.
This question can be applied to all aspects of life. See the examples below and try to think how you can apply this structure in other aspects of your life
FOR MY SPIRITUAL LIFE…
What’s the ONE Thing I can do to help others… ?
FOR MY PHYSICAL HEALTH…
What’s the ONE Thing I can do to ensure that I exercise… ?
FOR MY PERSONAL LIFE…
What’s the ONE Thing I can do to find time for myself… ?
FOR MY JOB..
What’s the ONE Thing I can do to improve my skills… ?
4. Extraordinary Results: Unlocking the Possibilities Within You
Our lives follow a natural rhythm, forming a straightforward formula for achieving extraordinary results: purpose, priority, and productivity. These three elements are tightly intertwined, constantly validating each other’s presence in our journey. They lead us to focus on two critical areas—the big ONE Thing, representing our overarching purpose, and the small ONE Thing, embodying the priority we act upon to fulfill that purpose. Remarkably productive individuals begin with their purpose, using it as a guiding compass for determining their priorities and driving their actions. This approach forms the most direct route to achieving exceptional outcomes.
Imagine these 3Ps as three components of an iceberg, with purpose lying beneath the surface, providing the foundation for the other two. A significant challenge is ensuring that our life’s purpose doesn’t devolve into an insatiable pursuit for fleeting happiness. Such a quest is bound to disappoint. Purpose serves as the clearest path to personal power and an enduring source of inner strength, bolstering our convictions and fortitude.
The recipe for extraordinary results involves identifying what truly matters to you and consistently taking actions that align with it. Uncover your Big Why by asking yourself what motivates you, what fuels your enthusiasm when you wake up in the morning, and what sustains you when exhaustion sets in. This essence, often referred to as your “Big Why,” fuels your excitement for life and underscores the reasons you engage in your chosen pursuits.
Our Event on Mastering Habir Building
During our in-person gathering at Bedford Studio in NYC on September 13, we had the pleasure of hosting a diverse group of women who added depth to our discussions. They passionately shared their thoughts on the book and offered valuable insights into the art of habit building. Our members also raised thought-provoking questions about the idea of choosing “the one thing,” recognizing that this privilege might not always be attainable, especially when viewed through the lens of gender dynamics. Women, often perceived as primary caregivers, may not always have the liberty to make such choices freely.
Nevertheless, as we listened to the various perspectives and engaged in this meaningful dialogue, we left the event with a renewed sense of empowerment and enthusiasm. It was a collective spark of motivation that inspired us all to take the next steps toward crafting the lives we eagerly anticipate waking up to.
Testimonials from our Participants
As we continue this journey together, remember that success isn’t about doing everything—it’s about doing the right things. So, keep asking yourself that powerful question, “What’s the one thing I can do such that by doing it, everything else will be easier or unnecessary?” Apply this mindset to every facet of your life, and you’ll unlock the doors to a world of extraordinary possibilities.
Thank you for being part of our reading community, and we invite you to share your favorite insights and thoughts from this chapter in the comments below. Here’s to your continued growth and success!